Sometimes a legend dies...

...goodbye Jeff Goldblum. We'll miss you.

Ok, ok, Jeff Goldblum is still alive BUT that was, what I thought, an hilarious Twitter rumor started yesterday after MJ passed.

Just in case you missed it...

MICHAEL JACKSON is DEAD.

Mark Sanford is lucky because no one cares about him anymore. And poor Farrah Fawcett has been upstaged by Jacko. You think he could have waited and died a few days later. RUDE.

Do you think Michael will come back to life in time for his concerts in London? I sure hope so.

Anyway, I ran out of time to write today and I am about to leave work and I really just want to go home and watch a movie because the weather is a total beeeeeyotch.

I love you guys. Really. I do. Stay you.

Love,
Jenna

Mid Week Pop Music Pick Me Up 6/24/09

Somethings tells me this group is from Sweden.

Why? Sweden loves Abba and this pop group loves singing Abba songs. "A"*Teens...Abba Teens...get it? Their first album was dedicated to Abba remakes. Though the only scene when you might listen to their version of "Mama Mia" would involve DDR or an old Now That's What I Call Music CD at a sleepover when you were 12. Or maybe that's just me.

Eventually the group branched out and sang a few of their own songs as well which is actually when those of us who watched Disney Channel growing up were introduced to their song, "Upside Down." It's my personal favorite. Any song that references dancing on the ceiling (thanks Lionel) is a personal favorite.

Oh Sweden and your glorious pop. Abba, A*Teens, Ace of Base. They're obsessed with the two boy, two girl combination. To each Country his own. Americans love a pop group that consists of five boys or five girls. Mess with that winning format and you will never reach the top of the pop group list. Why do you think 98 Degrees failed to keep up with NSYNC or Backstreet Boys? They needed that extra member to complete the perfect five part harmony and the classic "'V" dance formation. Duh.

Enjoy A*Teens. They broke up years ago so their few songs are all we have left.

Love,
Jenna

Sometimes only YOU...

...can make comedy happen. That's right folks, I need your help again. I have a show on July 16th and once again, if you don't come, I don't get any stage time.

So e-mail me at jenna@jennakimjones.com to let me know that you are coming to my show. The last time I performed at this club, it was packed and people were turned away so please make your reservations ASAP and remember to arrive early or you won't get in! The details are below!

Super Ego Comedy Showcase!
New York Comedy Club (241 East 24th b/t 2nd and 3rd)
Thursday July 16 9:00 PM
$10 cover ($8 w/ Student ID) + 2 drink minimum
Please e-mail me for a reservation ASAP (jenna@jennakimjones.com)

I know it's on a Thursday but don't be lame...it's the summer...you can handle starting your weekend a little early. It will be fun. Super fun.

Love,
Jenna

Jenna Kim's Fake Rumors 6/22/09

BABY GOT BACK: The more bounce in your booty, the more jiggle in your wiggle, the more junk in your trunk: THE LONGER YOU LIVE and you're probably one of those rap guy's girlfriend. According to a study done up in "Canada" (keep reading...you'll like Canada after this) carrying a few extra pounds around i.e. being a little "chubby" adds years to your life. If you love life, which you obviously do if you are already chubby, then stay chubby and you might get to enjoy it a little longer with your best friend cheesecake and his much different and equally delicious cousin cheese fries. No wonder skinny people are so miserable. They have no fatty food friends. After reading this study, Hollywood Celebrities are going on strike until they are allowed to eat again which seems weird to me because I'm pretty sure once you reach FAME, you're going to live forever.

NOW HIRING CELIBACY: Get paid to NOT have sex without becoming a Nun! In Greensboro, North Carolina, teenage girls are being paid to NOT get pregnant. Seriously. Every day you don't get pregnant, you get $1.00. Good for you! You didn't have sex and get pregnant! The money goes into an interest-bearing college fund that the winners collect if they don't have a baby when they graduate from high school. However, if you and whoever can't keep your clothes on you get pregnant, not only will your hard earned money be divided evenly among the other ladies but you will also be silently judged. If you drop out of high school completely, you actually have to pay $1.00 for every day you missed because you were with child. How 'bout them apples? If you are interested in earning $1.00 a day and you live in North Carolina and would like more information click here.

When you become a politician and you sneak away on a cruise with your girlfriend, don't come back. We're over it.

Love,
Jenna