Sometimes people think I should run...

...for Blonde. Not because I'm against brunettes. If elected, I could bring peace to a hair rivalry that has lasted altogether too long.

Being an unnaturally unnatural blonde, I've experienced and understand both sides of the hair color issues. I've reached across the aisle in an attempt to unite blondes and brunettes in order to put looks aside and do what is best for all, hair or no hair. I’ve dyed my hair myself for years. I’m an outsider to the hair colorist insiders. To them, I’m a hair maverick, mavericking my way through an unmavericky world.

I’m experienced. I don’t know how many times I have to tell you this but let me repeat myself, I am a very experienced born again blonde maverick.

Trust me.

Why?

1. My roots make me legit.

2. My hair glows = Beacon of light

3. Always able to meet or exceed extremely low expectations.

4. A flip of the hair is more powerful than a “Gosh darn, can I call you Joe?, wink.”

5. I never pal around with red heads.

6. Blonde's are way funner.

Blondes and brunettes, put your differences aside.

Vote.

Love,
Jenna

Sometimes we are all tools...

...in the worst sense of the word.

So what?

Love,
Pink

Sometimes I start hilarious posts...

...and forget to finish them. I wrote some funny stuff about Sarah Palin last Friday morning. Now the jokes are outdated. I've heard several similar to them. So that post is lost forever. Never to be read by my 16 readers.

Sorry boys and women, I'll write faster next time.

Anything anyone not tired of hearing about that I could write about to distract ourselves from the election, the economy and the end of the earth?

No?

Well...

Another big debate tonight. McCain's supposed to kill. Not literally, although he's capable of it. Obama, well, he just has to answer the questions. Who has the low expectations now?

Here are my questions about tonight's big debate:

How many people will get alcohol poisoning from the word "Maverick?"

How many times will I think about how bored I am?

How many times will McCain's heart almost stop?

Answers: countless people, countless thoughts, and countless near death heartbeats.

Love,
Jenna