Arrested: The Easter Bunny was arrested yesterday for indecent exposure. So...that's awkward. If Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton and other Hollywood geniuses aren't required to wear underwear, is the Easter Bunny really required to wear pants?
e-Harmony Is For Lo...han's: When I was rejected from e-Harmony for being what they called, "too complicated," I thought, at least Lindsay Lohan would be rejected too.
Now that Lohan has been accepted, my fate it sealed. I will die alone, with a bag of SunChips in hand, watching reruns of Law & Order, wearing elastic waist pants, surrounded by cats (who may or may not even be mine) and walls plastered with posters of Zac Efron.
Humble Pie: South Park put Kanye West in his place in a recent episode that Kanye claims has humbled him. Kanye had this to say, "Kanye is so sorry that he only thought about himself. Kanye is ready to put the ego aside and just work on making dope music." He was then interrupted by his publicist who whispered something in his ear. The microphone picked up what he whispered back, "I was doing what again? Speaking in 3rd person feels more natural." Kanye turned back to the mic and said, "Kanye, I mean, I will take questions now. Man in the ill fitting suite, go ahead and ask. Excuse me, you, did you just look me in the eyes? Come on, man, I'm trying to change and you are making it difficult for me. I'm the Obama of music. Change? Yes, he, I can!"
The Hook-Up: K-Fed and B. Spears are rumored to be giving their STDs to each other again. They too were accepted on e-Harmony (I may as well give up and get fat) and their personality profiles matched them up. Hey world, accept it. K-Fed and B. Spears will forever gross us out and there is nothing we can do about it.
I'm JK! (high five or punch in the stomach depending on who you are)
Love,
Jenna
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If it makes you feel any better, I haven't heard many good things about eharmony, so many freaks get accepted that it's not funny. And nearly every girl I've talked to that has been on there has horror stories to tell about the jerks or nut cases she's been matched with... Maybe that says something about the quality of people I talk to... I must go reflect on this.
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