...that are wadded up on the floor in my room but you see my room is so small that one piece of paper takes up all of the floor space. I'd been stepping on this paper to get from my bed to the door for about a week. I couldn't remember where it came from or why it was there but I assumed it was just more of my poorly written notes. Eventually, I was feeling a little lazy so for my exercise, I bent down and picked it up. It was a list, sloppily written in pencil, obviously by me as I have pathetic left handed handwriting and use pencils. I read it out loud:
"1. Two eyes that work relatively well in unison. No wandering eye otherwise it's one eye on the face, while the other eye looks elsewhere and you keep saying, "Excuse me, I'm up here!"
2. Preferably not homosexual. I'm not ready for that.
3. Somewhat opposed to midgets (think about it) but would consider Ryan Seacrest.
4. Smart enough.
5. Has loving, non-racist Grandma."
The list sounded an awful lot like something I may have compiled during some kind of female bonding class/workshop/sleepover. You know, like, "let's make a list of all the things we look for in a guy" and then talk about Seth Cohen for nine more hours.
BUT then I noticed what it said at the top of the page:
Criteria I'm looking for in Presidential Candidate
Imagine, a month ago, I had the audacity to hope that I was going to vote for a candidate who had a Grandma who loved everybody, no matter what their skin color. It seems that is quite a lot to ask for.
I wonder what other treasures of truth/pieces of paper I've got lying around.
Love,
Jenna
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2 comments:
#1 had me dying laughing. So funny. At first I figured it was a list of prerequisites for your future EC, which made it even funnier to me. Anyways, thanks for makin' me laugh like all the time.
...could also be: "desired qualities in a child".
very funny. I enjoy your blog!
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