You're Too Ugly For My Ears: "Sarah Palin is only interesting because she's got sex appeal. America has never seen such an attractive female politician. In a few years, she won't be as attractive and we'll stop listening to her. " - some guy on CNN (I'm paraphrasing, of course.) Wait a minute, Americans only listen to attractive political female figures? Condi and Hillary and Madeline are flattered.
Heavily Armed Woman: Madonna has nasty arms. Apparently the rest of America discovered that this week, even though I've been talking about them for what seems like forever. Do you think she is training for something? Like J. Lo in Enough? Is she going after Guy Ritchie? Run, Guy, run! That movie not end well for the man.
Candy is good for you, finally: As you've probably heard, blue M&M's help cure AIDS. Oh wait, I'm sorry, I got that wrong. They can help with back problems? Sure. It's actually the blue dye that helps. So drink up the blue die and your back will feel brand new. Who cares that you'll turn bright blue like Violet in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory? I mean, if you're cool with people asking, "Why so blue?" every four minutes, by all means, go for it. Don't say I didn't warn you.
Do you ever see a person and think they look smelly? That's how I feel about Anne Hathaway. And Matthew McCounaughey. Though we all know he smells because he lives outside, on purpose, and he refuses to wear deodorant. Who else smells? Monique probably smells like carbs. And Janice Dickenson smells like a hot glue gun. I bet Cameron Diaz's feet smell. Miley Cyrus smells annoying. And the Jonas Brothers smell like purity, chastity and fine, I'll stop. Oh I'm so mean today!
My newest nickname at work is Jenna Cakes. Does that make me sound fat?
Love,
Jenna
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1 comment:
love it.
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